Most of us are familiar with the term ‘midlife crisis’. It’s referenced a lot in popular culture, often in a humorous way, referring to the common sense of regret, emotional turmoil, and strong urge to make significant life changes many of us feel as we approach middle age, and the second half of life.
The phrase midlife crisis was coined by Elliot Jaques in the mid-1960s, interpreting it as a period when ‘we come face to face with our limitations, our restricted possibilities, and our mortality’. The struggles we face in midlife will be experienced uniquely by each person and is a personal journey for each individual.
In this post, I’ll explore some of the most common signs of a midlife crisis and discuss some ways this time of life, instead of being a crisis, can be an opportunity to find lasting change, deeper life satisfaction, and personal growth.
Signs of a midlife crisis
Dissatisfaction with your Life
A growing sense of general discontent with your life could show itself in any number of ways. If things look great on the outside – you’re financially stable, in a happy marriage, and with plenty to look forward to – so it might not make logical sense. Many of us start asking big questions such as ‘is this it?’ amid feelings of unfulfillment.
An urge to make big life changes
It’s perfectly normal for many people experiencing what’s known as a midlife crisis to start making changes to their life. If you are starting to take stock of where you have settled in life, and are not completely happy with where you are, you may be looking to make decisions in regard to your career, your finances, hobbies, or maybe even your long-term relationship. This is part of re-evaluating your life and can be an exciting and positive thing if managed in a healthy and responsible way.
Regretting the past
Many people experience regrets and what-ifs when taking stock of past decisions and achievements. This might show up as disappointment at how your life has turned out, or feeling that if you had known what you know now, you would not have chosen a particular path, whether that be in work, finances, family, relationships, and time management. Many people can feel as though they achieved too little or didn’t spend as much time with loved ones as they could have. Know that this is a common experience, and it’s possible to make peace with your past.
The opportunities midlife can bring
While getting older and navigating the middle years of your life can feel confronting, and bring up some challenging emotions, there are so many ways it can be leveraged for a deeper sense of fulfilment. What can seem like a crisis at first can teach us new things about ourselves, and show us where our priorities might need to change.
While you may be struggling to make peace with some regrets, you may want to reframe this experience as an invitation to start dreaming again, in some new and exciting ways. This could open up some fantastic possibilities, whether that looks like a career change, working on your health and fitness and finding a new zest for life you never had, or investing time in your relationship with children, spouse, or family.
While it’s normal to feel out of your depth, know that you’re not alone in it, and you are allowed to take all the time you need to process your feelings, and make peace with your past.
Life’s 2nd Act is a podcast and blog that explores the challenges that the mid to later stages in life can bring.
To explore the podcast and join me on the journey of finding direction and purpose, click here.
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